When Should a Son Stop Sleeping With His Mother? Answered!

Co-sleeping is a popular choice among many parents, but there is a time to transition your kids to their own beds. It’s important to consider when that is and how you are going to do it.

When should a son stop sleeping with his mother? Though there is not one set answer to this question, most people agree that a son does not need to keep sleeping with his mother once he has started going through puberty. This can start anywhere between 10-12 years of age. In most cases, it’s better to transition long before this point.

Most mothers stop co-sleeping with their sons earlier than puberty, while some never co-sleep at all. You have to consider different factors to decide what’s right for you and your family. 

What Age Should a Boy Sleep Alone?

Your culture, circumstances, and personal preferences will help you decide when it’s time for your son to sleep alone.

General Recommendations

Co-sleeping is actually not recommended if your child is under the age of one due to safety concerns. After that, it’s considered safe, and bed-sharing is practiced in many countries. 

When it comes to how long bed-sharing is appropriate, there’s no clear-cut answer. However, your child needs a certain amount of privacy as they enter puberty, so it makes sense for them to sleep in their own bed.

Bed Sharing With Baby: Pros and Cons

Bed-sharing with kids has some definite benefits. It may help you bond with your baby, and it can make breastfeeding easier.

Bed sharing eliminates how often you have to get out of bed at night to soothe your crying baby, and that means more rest for you both.

However, there are also disadvantages. If you co-sleep with children under the age of one, you can accidentally harm them in their sleep by rolling on top of them.

If you wait until they are past the infant stage, you avoid the risk of physical harm but will definitely be setting patterns that are hard to break. 

Kids who bed-share may depend on it to rest. If it starts affecting your rest and you need to stop bed-sharing, your child may be so dependent on your presence that he has trouble sleeping on his own. 

Long-Term Effects of Co-Sleeping

Some professionals recommend the co-sleeping arrangement end by a child’s second birthday because of the long-term impact of this approach.

Bed-sharing can lead to less sleep for your child, and sleep deprivation can lead to poor health outcomes. 

Kids who sleep with their parents for too long may also have a hard time forging their own identities.

If they become too dependent on their parents and don’t learn how to deal with sleep and other challenges on their own, they may not know that they can.

When Co-Sleeping With Son Is Permissible

Every situation has to be considered before you decide when to co-sleep with your son. Certain health conditions may make it necessary to keep your child close so you can help him with issues that come up at night. 

There will also be situations where you allow your son to sleep with you so he isn’t anxious. If your child has a nightmare or can’t sleep due to a huge storm, it’s normal to let him crawl into bed with you so he can be comforted and rest.

When Co-Sleeping Is Definitely Inappropriate

Once your son starts going through puberty, the co-sleeping arrangement definitely needs to end. Your child will need his privacy, and he can’t have that if he is in bed with his mom every night.

It’s wise to end the co-sleeping relationship before puberty starts, but it definitely should not continue after that point.

How To Decide What’s Right for You

Co-sleeping isn’t right for everyone, and that’s okay. Sleep is extremely important, and if co-sleeping makes it harder for you to rest, then it may not be the right choice.

If you do want to co-sleep, make sure you know when and how you want to transition out of that phase so your child will learn to sleep independently.

Your child may also want to stop co-sleeping before you do, and you need to honor that decision as well.

Best Age To Transition From Co-Sleeping

When your child gets their own big-kid bed around the age of two and a half or three, it’s a great time to start moving away from co-sleeping.

Getting a big-kid bed can be a milestone for your child, so you can celebrate. Making this transition a happy one instead of focusing on the loss of co-sleeping will help your child look forward to it and have success.

How To Transition From Co-Sleeping

There are a few things you can do to make the transition away from co-sleeping easier.

1. Create a bedtime routine, and do it each night.
2. Sleep with your child in his room for a few minutes when he first transitions to his own bed.
3. Try letting your child sleep in his own bed at nap times before trying it at night.
4. Be flexible, and help your child develop confidence in his self-soothing skills.

Related Questions: 

When Should a Boy Stop Wetting the Bed?

By the age of seven, a child should be able to sleep through the night without wetting the bed. However, a small portion of children will still have accidents after this age, and the majority of them will be boys.

If your child is wetting the bed consistently after turning seven, make sure to check with your doctor to make sure it’s not a health issue.

When Should a Baby Sleep All Night?

A baby sleeping through the night is probably not what you think. Babies don’t sleep for long periods like adults, so sleeping all night for an infant looks a bit different. Expect your child to sleep for 4-6 hour stretches by six months of age.

Closing Thoughts 

You have to make the right sleeping decisions for your family. Just take your child’s privacy and needs into account, and don’t forget about your own needs — they are important too!